Vicious Cycle
I'm stuck. I've been in love with the same person for three years now and I can't just let it go. He wants to be friends...I can't because I still have very strong feelings for him. It feels like one of those bad sitcoms where you always want to two main characters to get together but they never do.
It's vicious...
Earth Day...
Yes...this is also my birthday. YAY!!! Happy 26th birthday to me! I hope it is good.
Goodnight everyone!
It's been too long...
Well....I'm back. It's been way to long. I guess almost three years since my last post. I didn't even know this blog was still out there but thanks to the magic of recovery...here we are.
A lot has changed since we last spoke. I worked for almost three years in the multimedia design industry and finally decided that I was unhappy. I'm now back in school and really enjoying it.
Things are really, really good. I am very content with myself and my life. The only thing is that I would like to lose some weight but who wouldn't.
Looking back and reading previous posts was definitely interesting. I had forgotten all about most of them, and was pleasantly surprised to find that they still existed. It brought back memories of that time that was so difficult for me. I'm so glad that it is in the past now. I refer to that year as my dark year, I was so sad and unhappy with myself. But things are good now, I'm glad that I had the strength and the support of my friends and family to see me through it.
So...here we are, and I will be around.
Rejection, Reflection, Recovery
So....I've had enough. I feel as though I've been being walked all over for most of my life. Especially by men. Well I've decided that they aren't worth it. Most of them anyways....I have a number of guy friends who would be very disappointed to hear that I thought they weren't worth it......so to all of you I'm not talking about you -- you are great!! (and yes that includes you....even though I haven't seen you in about five years).
But anyway....I'm tired of being walked on and I'm tired of being sad....I want to be happy and carefree and why not. I'm young and I have a lot going for me. I know that might sound conceded but I need to be a little conceded right now because I'm so down on myself. That's really unhealth and I know that so I need to do something about it.
Work is good...friends are good. So I guess I really have nothing to worry about.
Good night blogspoters....and good night moon.
Weight Watchers isn't fooling around....
So...my parents and I want to lose a little weight. I mainly want to get my eating habits under control and just tone up a bit because I'm really not fat. So anyways we started weight watchers last week Monday so we've been going for exactly a week now and I've LOST 5 POUNDS already. No shit I really have lost five pounds in a week. And it was so easy because I still got to eat whatever the hell I wanted and I never went hungry.
I don't understand it and I don't want too all I know is that it works like a charm....if you are having trouble losing weight JOIN WEIGHT WATCHERS!!!! I really works and it really isn't all that expensive (unless you are in college and then it might be a little pricey).
P.S. I don't work for them and they aren't paying me to say that (nor do I get any specials of any kind). I'm just a regular person who wanted to lose a few pounds and weight watchers has gotten me well on my way.
P.P.S. I got some great news today....the thing that was bothering me in my last post well it's gone now. Thank God it blew over really fast!!
Life Just Happened....
Well I just got some bad news.....I won't tell you exactly what it is but it has to do with a mistake that I made some six months ago. I feel like I will be dealing with mistakes from my past for the rest of my life. That blows.
I just graduated and I don't really have any close friends at home anymore....at least it feels that way. So I really don't have anyone to talk to about it. Oh well....it could be much much worse than it is so I guess I have that to be thankful for. Life will just be different for a while that's all. Things will get better and that's all that really matters I guess.
I got a part-time job which has the potential to move into a full time job so that's good too. I start on Monday. There aren't any benefits and I only get to work 20 hours a week but I guess it's better than nothing. We'll see how things work out.
I guess I'm at an okay place with myself right now. My parents and I started weight watchers yesterday and it's probably the easiest diet I've ever been on....so far anyways. I'm going to join a gym and start doing aerobics three times a week if I can. I want to get in shape....I want to be really happy with my body so that's what I'm working towards right now. I'm also working on updating my portfolio with projects that I'm proud of. I have one free lance job going right now and I might have another one soon. This is fantastic because I know I'll have time to do it because I have a part-time job.
Getting together with David on Friday for lunch and shopping. Hopefully this weekend I can get together with Angie maybe at the Big Bang downtown. We'll see.....
When it rains it pours....and I'm praying for sunshine.
An hour and a half and the rest of my life....
So it finally happened, an hour and a half on Saturday morning and my undergraduate career is over. I've left Maryville and am now home in St. Louis. It's good to be home but I'm starting to miss the college lifestyle already. Oh lord I have to be a real person and get a real job!! Hmmm....that makes me nervous. Well more later....I'm a bit tired right now and I'm going to take a nap.
